Omni Consumer Products Strikes Deal With City of Detroit
Detroit, MI- The multi-billion dollar corporation, O.C.P., has struck a deal with Detroit in order to settle the financial woes of the city.
The city of Detroit has been in financial straits for the past 6 years, and with no relief in sight, has turned its eyes to the thriving O.C.P. corporation who has welcomed the troubled city with open arms. The bailout plan, estimated at 25 billion dollars, includes many facets that will get the city back on its feet, including a growth of jobs in the section of Old Detroit that has been in chaotic turmoil for over a decade.
The president of O.C.P. is eager to get the city back on it’s feet. “Old Detroit has a cancer. The cancer is crime, and it must be cut out before we employ the 2 million workers that will breathe life into the city again.”
In order to establish a crime-free Old Detroit, O.C.P. has implemented a suave legal move in the bailout plan to gain private ownership of the Detoit Police Department, leaving skeptics on their toes about what this will mean for the citizens. Senior Vice President of O.C.P., Dick Jones, is not naive about the criminal activity in Old Detroit. “Every policeman knows when he joins the force, there are certain inherent risks that come with the territory. Ask any cop and he’ll tell you, if you can’t stand the heat, you better stay out of the kitchen.”
With an already record set of police officers killed on the job, O.C.P. has been making plans to pacify the streets with sophisticated, top-of-the-line crime-fighting projects. “An efficient police force is only part of the solution,” said Jones. “No, we need something more. We need a 24 hour a day police officer. A cop who doesn’t need to eat or sleep. A cop with superior firepower, and the reflexes to use it.” The “Enforcement Droid 209” is O.C.P.’s solution, which is set to tour the city of Old Detroit within the next month. There have been rumors that despite the superior firepower of the E.D. 209, it still may have difficulty dealing with such trivial things as staircases, or being able to hear a gun drop on the floor, but Jones dismissed the rumors with a shake of his hand. “What happened during a meeting with Mr. Kinney was a glitch, a temporary set-back.”
And if the E.D. 209 fails to succeed, Security Concepts whiz kid Bob Morton has been developing a contingency plan known only as “Robocop,” a cyborg with the body of a robot and the human mind of a police officer operating it.
Of course, the plans of a “Robocop” cyborg are unconfirmed by O.C.P., but the citizens of Detroit are trying to stay hopeful that better times will come, and they will take whatever they can, whether it be from their government, or a giant corporate conglomerate such as Omni Consumer